5ives: Merlin’s Lists of Five Things

I love this guy’s lists of five things. All of the recent ones are hilarious!



Five things I suppose you could do to “the vote” if you ever tire of “rocking” it

  1. Broast the Vote!
  2. Pummel the Vote!
  3. Gently Strum the Vote!
  4. Benchpress the Vote!
  5. Botox the Vote!


Five companies I suspect I may be the bitch of

  1. Gillette
  2. Apple
  3. Sprint
  4. Costco
  5. Trader Joe’s


Five skills I’ve allowed to badly atrophy over the years

  1. wheelie popping
  2. snaking, loogie-hocking, and general spitting
  3. climbing and scaling
  4. ramp jumping
  5. snatching stacks of quarters from elbow (as seen on Happy Days)


Five things it’s probably better not to do when you’re kind of drunk

  1. buy domain names
  2. hire an attorney
  3. do lots of file management from the command line
  4. sort out your finances
  5. telephone people you remember fondly from elementary school


Five computer technologies I could really use in my physical office

  1. Exposé
  2. incremental searching
  3. undo
  4. sort by date (descending)
  5. cold reboot

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